My, oh, my, where do we begin with this one? While the temptation of making fun of Miss Joanie Laurer for looking so very much like a man and for being a lower-class version of Anna Nicole Smith (yes, there are depths that not even the late trainwreck has reached) - that, without even including that she sold her own homemade sex tape, thus making it possible for us to see parts of her body that would have suited better a tranny than a woman - is more than strong, still, I say, we should not overlook her many achievements in the world of wrestling. Because, she might be a genuine attention whore, but Chyna was unmatchable in the ring and whoever claims otherwise clearly has no idea what they're talking about.

Little is known about Joanie's childhood, other than the few details that she herself provided for us in her best-selling autobiography 'If They Only Knew'. But, by the looks of things, hers was clearly not a happy childhood, given that, prior to her parents' divorce, her drunken father used to physically and verbally abuse both her and her mother. Not that things got any better after the two were separated, either way... Joanie recalls that her mother had 'revolving door marriages', that left her and her older sister Kathy with the impression that each new year brought a new father figure in the household, a man that would afterwards be gone before they even knew it, only to be replaced with a new one. Joanie claims that she was raised mostly by Kathy, her sister, up until she was 15 - and for that she will for ever be indebted to her.

When she turned 15, Joanie left home to study in Spain with a grant and, because she liked it there so much, she also enlisted at the university upon graduating from high school. In 1992, she graduated from the University of Tampa with a degree in Spanish literature but, still, she would not return home, lingering there for yet another five months, traveling and keeping odd jobs to support herself. Initially, she thought of taking a job within the FBI or the Drug Enforcement Administration but, for some reason or another, she was repeatedly denied admittance. Instead, she joined the Peace Corps and was sent to Costa Rica to teach literacy - to her credit, Joanie was more than fit for the job, possessing both impressive pedagogical skills and thorough knowledge of Spanish, German and French.

In 1996, Joanie was back in the US, competing in the New York City regional of the Fitness America, as a means of pursuing another older dream of hers. However, one year afterwards, while belly-dancing in a bar, she met Triple H and Shawn Michaels who, impressed by her stunning and massive physique, introduced her to the world of wrestling. From that moment on, but not before training with none other than Killer Kowalski, Joanie slowly elbowed her way into the business but her trajectory was far from the ones of other female wrestlers. Initially working as the bodyguard of Triple H, she soon became a heel in major confrontations against established male wrestlers and, later on, a face, only to switch back to heel after a short period. In between 1997 and 2001, Laurie, now going under the name Chyna (Doll) was the most feared woman in the ring, both by men and women wrestlers, a multi-champion and a virtual money-making machine. Truth be told now, with her strength and body size that could easily have put a slimmer man to shame, Chyna took female wrestling to lengths it had never been before, while also becoming the 'most beautiful woman in the history of wrestling'. But good things never last for too long and Chyna herself would soon find out all about that.

In 2001, after rumors about her then-boyfriend doing the Executive Vice President of Talent and Creative Writing at WWE (doing, as in, 'making sweet, passionate love to'), Chyna refused to have her contract renewed and left on her own will, thus putting an end to her career as a professional wrestler. Unfortunately, this also meant that she would never again be the celebrity that she had been so far, but she couldn't have known it at the time. Already with many champion titles, a couple of extremely successful 'Playboy' covers and spreads, and with more modeling gigs than any other woman in her branch under her belt, Chyna probably thought that she could live the superstar dream for eternity. Therefore, she boldly threw herself into the world of movies and television, only to be met with the utmost sarcasm and skepticism for forgetting that what had made her a star had been wrestling and not other talents that she might have (or not) had. The whole debacle culminated in 2004, when a sex tape featuring her and former boyfriend and WWE colleague Sean Waltman was released by the same company that also marketed 'One Night in Paris'.

Unlike Paris Hilton's amateur porn tape, Joanie's '1 Night in China' revealed a truth that had long been suspected, meaning, that her steroids abuse throughout the years had changed her body in ways that made her even more manly than before. Aside from making her bass-voice more noticeable by being shot in a small, quiet hotel room, the tape also showed her pierced three-inch long clitoris (which seemed to have a fully formed glans) and a very severe case of buttock acne, a clear indication of roids abuse. But, hey, at least she got payed for showing off the massive heat that she was packing: both she and Waltman cut a deal with the X-rated movie studio and got a share of the profits - again, unlike celebutante Paris Hilton (meh, cough, cough). One year later, Joanie was in police custody for beating the crap out of Waltman - and, thus, a beautiful love story came to an end.

Since then (2004), Joanie continued her downfall by constantly putting herself in the spotlight for all the wrong reasons and by continuing to give contradictory television interviews. Oh, and she also starred in the movie of the century, called 'Illegal Aliens', next to the late glamor model/equal attention seeker Anna Nicole Smith, that she tried to promote even immediately after Smith passed away in strange circumstances. More recently, Joanie admitted to a history of drug and alcohol abuse, as well as to the many plastic surgeries she underwent throughout the years, including her big flotation devices/breasts, custom made to fit her large frame and resistant enough so as not to be busted during wrestling (Chyna once broke a boob during a confrontation and had to have the implant replaced). She also claimed to have found God and religion and vouched for a new life dedicated to the greater good... but we'll see about that in time.

To wrap things up a bit, I have to admit that I'm a bit lost when it comes to Joanie. I knew of her before starting to do my research on her life, thanks to the whole Anna Nicole scandal and, frankly, I always thought she was born a man who had gone the Amanda Lepore way (Google her if you don't know who this rare and exquisite beauty is!). Apparently, I was wrong - and I'd like to emphasize on apparently! However, an attention whore or not (but most likely, yes), Chyna was a great wrestler and no one can take that from her; not even her more recent antics can make people forget about that. For what she was and what she stood for, Chyna has my IN vote and, now, it's your turn: is Chyna, a professional sportswoman who's only going through some rough times at the moment, or a tragic trainwreck that should get her head checked pronto? IN or OUT? But be gentle with her, will you...

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